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Anonymous Sex: What is Sex?

Anonymous Sex: What is Sex? Date 5/12/2005 12:00 AM | Topic: OpinionFor our last column, the ladies of Anonymous Sex would like to challenge our readers to wax philosophically.

The end of the academic year has come, and as we all prepare ourselves mentally for final exams, we would like to examine the meaning of sex. What is it, and what does it mean to us? From virginity to dating to orgasms, we talked with several upperclasspeople and engaged in a personal dialogue with each about their perspective on the most obsessed-about indoor sport.What does it mean to lose your virginity? A female fourth-year student tells us, "I was a sophomore in college, it was intercourse and I enjoyed it. I was drinking, but not drunk.

When he put his arm around me I thought, I'm probably going to have sex with him tonight. Am I okay with that? Yeah." How do we define sex? A graduating senior who identifies himself as gay thinks "society's definition is too narrow. It is a fault to define sex merely as penetration.

[Sex is] mutually sharing a moment between two people and stimulating each other in a way that brings both to orgasm. Some say oral sex isn't sex, but being so close to someone else is way more intimate than just penetration, with or without a condom."Yeah, in order to put someone else's genitals in your mouth you must really like them. This statement brings up the question of closeness.

One student voiced past concerns about self-consciousness, saying she "worried about giving bad head." She worried about what her partner might say to his friends, and if she might be the butt of rumors. She observed that in her present long-term relationship, she and her boyfriend are "in love, and we help each other."A graduating female student reflects on her change in attitude over the past several years.

"I remember seeing a Seinfeld episode where Elaine asks Jerry, 'At what point would you say sex has taken place?' Jerry thinks for a second, then says 'Well, I would say when the nipple makes its first appearance.' At the time, I was a virgin and that meant I would have lost my virginity...

I didn't quite agree with it, and though I wasn't completely inexperienced, I wasn't ready to have sex. Now, if I'm close enough with someone to get naked, I'm close enough to rock their world." One female upperclassperson has come full circle. "I was sixteen when I lost my virginity.

I wanted to wait until I really loved someone, and it meant something real to me. He was my first high school boyfriend. But I became promiscuous after awhile, and I wanted to have more experiences, then as I grew older I changed again. I was pretty conservative at first, and now it needs to mean something again.

..I haven't had sex for three months now."A graduating senior who identifies herself as bisexual urges people to push boundaries and definitions.

"So what if you think you're straight. If you're attracted to someone, just go for it. After I came out I was surprised at all the straight girls who came up to me. Sometimes it was hot, sometimes it was weird.

"The ladies of Anonymous Sex want to send you off for the summer with a challenge. No, it's not to "get laid in the shade," like the classic yearbook catch phrase. We challenge you to reflect on your own personal definition of sex, and what it means to you - what you want it to mean.


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